I just wanted to let my fellow BetterU’ers know I have been in on the conference call each week but haven’t spoken…I have logged in a few minutes late each time and rather than interrupt I just hang out. So, as an update: I am blogging at least weekly, I am exercising with my trainer’s strengthening program at my local gym and jogging, (both three times a week) I am eating healthy (following the 17 Day Diet plan)… but I am not journaling.  I notice this is a huge sticking point for the program and I would be lying if I said I am interested in starting.  I have done it before and hate it.  Not because it’s some big epiphany about my terrible habits, but rather because it forces me to consider food all day long.  I am an over- eater, I am a comfort -eater, I eat every emotion I have.  Now, with my new focus, my new habits, and my new diversions, adding journaling is a maddening idea.  My husband makes my breakfast according to our diet, I pack my lunch, and snacks according to our diet and he makes our supper, also accordingly.  My “journaling” is manifested in pre-planning, rather than post consumption.  Weekends are sketchy but I am ok with that, a bit of mindful freedom is keeping me grounded, willing, and sane.  When I say “diet” I don’t mean a restriction plan, but rather simply what we are eating, guided by the lessons we are learning from a book on nutrition.  I have lost 27lbs in 7 weeks, my BMI is down from 44.31% to 39.88% and I am wearing my formerly “too small” section of closet.  Journaling isn’t going to happen.                Sorry.                                                                                Stubbornly yours, Jenny

10 days since my last post?  Naughty, naughty.  It's been busy, but enough of the excuses, slacker.  I am happy to report that I am now jogging three times a week and lifting weights three times a week.  I have also just marked a milestone...I am no longer morbidly obese-just plain obese!  My BMI is now below 40!  Yay!  What I look forward to in the next week or so is another milestone.  I was mentally processing where I've been with my weight over the last, say, 15 years, and realized in about 5 more pounds I will be smaller than my children have ever seen me.  I have not been below my pre-pregnancy weight since having children, so my girls have never known me thinner than right now.  Pretty complex in terms of feelings, you see my kids are 14 and 12.  That's a lot of missed opportunities, in hindsight...
However, I'm not going to let regret stymie my momentum...I'm going to push on through.  I'm going to enjoy this instead of be ashamed or embarassed.  Yes, my family deserves more, and I'm finally going to be able to give it to them.  If nothing else, I hope they will see the fight their mom has in her and that some battles are long but no less worth the fight.
As I finish my salad and regret that it is ending I realize I am a very different person than just a few months ago...still moody and demanding...that'll be my next challenge...but a salad lover?  Who'd a thunk it?  Keep at it!        Jenny

OK, so I had a girls-night-out in Fort Wayne on Saturday...then my husband's birthday was on Sunday, and well, honestly, every Friday night is a gimme at our house.  With that preface let's dive in...  So, the mantra for Saturday night was "What happens in Fort Wayne, stays in Fort Wayne" but apparently my scale didn't get the memo.  Four of those lost pounds (yes, four) I found 'em!  I got on the scale this morning being fully aware that it was going to be a stunning blow.  In the past I would've ignored it...no news is good news- Ignorance is bliss-and all that.  But today, I knew that the fastest way to get me back on track and motivated to be there was through truth and reality.  (Not my best friends but we are becoming amicable.)  So with a therapeutic confession to my husband (poor guy also gained four pounds this weekend...hey wait, maybe it's the scale's fault) we dove back into the habits we've diligently developed over the past 43 days that we've been working thru the 17 Day Diet cycles.   And, FYI, I felt like doody on Sunday...(not entirely from "Fort Wayne," I was relatively well behaved) but from the junk I'd been eating, and the drastic decrease in my H2O intake.  Negative reinforcement, so good for me.  A nutritional hand-slap...       "Please, sir, may I have another?    I'm back baby!  Jenny

Tough one...

 Its been a tough couple of days for me.  I turned to my old friend "Chips"...I even invited "Chocolate" for a spin on the dance floor of my debauchery.  However...Today I woke up in the same old bed, I put on the same old clothes, but I knew that I am not the same old me.  The chips and chocolate had my yesterday, but they do not own today.  I do.   I forfeited yesterday because I forgot that worry, anger, and frustration are just feelings.  They are not power.  Sometimes they feel very powerful, but only because I allow them to.  I will not regret yesterday because that would give me a sense of weakness, of failing.  I instead choose to acknowledge it as an opportunity to know myself more, to grow a little, and to develop new strategies.  Did eating change any of those issues that are bugging me?  Nope.  Would a spin on the bike have fixed them?  No, but that ride would have made me feel more in control instead of less so.  So, what do I know today?  That I'm in charge of what goes in and what I feel, how I react, how I behave.     I got the reigns...so where to?  Jenny

Ok, so my hubby and I decided to have "treats" for Super Bowl...I made homemade Spaetzle to go with our Pork Roast and giant salads and Homemade PB cookies.  I had one serving of Spaetzle (we are doing the low carb thing BTW) and only one PB cookie!  Yay Me!  I bought Doritos for my "treat" and I am happy to say I didn't even eat a whole serving...just didn't taste quite as I had anticipated...anti-climactic really.  I am thrilled!  I had actually wanted Hot Fries but the store we were at doesn't carry them...Whew!  I would've had to work harder versus the Hot Fries, but all in all I'm calling it a success. Still lost weight too!  Total down since Jan 2 = 22lbs!  Yay! 

Where has the morning gone?

11:30 and I have yet to drink any water!  Naughty, naughty!  I've had my green tea, and of course COFFEE (cue: clouds parting, sunstreaming down, and angelic choir singing) So to the nutrition room for some good ol' H2O.  Enjoying a light peach yogurt...sorry to my girls, as it is one of their "chosen flavors"  not from my giant vat of vanilla...mmmmm good.  Let the drinking, ice crunching (looove iiit!) and insane number of trips to the litterbox begin...

Blogging Launch

Helllllooooooooo!  I am a blogger!  Who'd a thunk it? 

Hi, I'm Jenny...I heart carbs...On January 2, my hubby and I began a journey.  We are eating right, exercising, and learning to make better choices.  I'm down 21lbs (Yay!) and while some days the crackers can be overheard taunting me from the pantry, many days they hold no power.  On January 27, I began the BetterU challenge as well.  My employer, Physicians Hospital System, has again reminded me that they not only take amazing care of our patients, but they take care of their employees as well by providing 12 of us this incredible opportunity.  So, grab some water, a bag of carrots, and come with me as I boldly laugh in the face of Hot Fries and their delicious friends, and take control of my health.